Inner Game

Unshakeable confidence: a practical guide {po...

August 11, 2017 / Inner Game / 2 comments

It’s easy to let how you feel about yourself be the unspoken force that runs your business.  When you’re feeling shiny and confident, you do FacebookLives! You write! You book clients!  But when you’re feeling down, or anything less than radiantly magnetic, that energy wanes and everything winds slowly to a halt.  This can only reinforce the not-feeling-great feelings and it becomes a tough cycle to break out of, made worse by the pressure on yourself to change!right!now! Building your confidence is a key component of business development.  Taking in your impact, accepting that you help people, and anchoring that in so that you can revisit it when you’re feeling down is a huge part of the emotional journey of creating your empire. In this episode, I speak to why we act from Neo in the Matrix, and exactly what … Continue reading

A Few Things You Need To Survive The Holidays...

November 23, 2015 / Inner Game / 4 comments

This American Thanksgiving, I am so grateful for YOU.  Reader, Frequency Finder, Client, Entrepreneur Dream Chaser, Empire Builder. Whenever I email my readers, I include a section on “Cool Things From Around The Internet!” this week I wanted to share resources to help you have conversations with your family about what you do.  It quickly spiraled into a collection of on point giggleworthy graphics, articles and cartoons about this life we’ve chosen for ourselves. Behold a hilarious round up of the realities of working for yourself.   Dive into these for giggles, laughter, moral support and a big ole reminder that you’re not alone. The Oatmeal, Making Things.  This cartoon captures the joy, elation and depression perfectly.  If you haven’t seen it yet it’s required reading. This listcicle from Buzzfeed about the realities of working from home has me busting up every … Continue reading

Magic Lessons A Podcast By Elizabeth Gilbert ...

September 28, 2015 / Inner Game / no comments

I am in love with Elizabeth Gilberts podcast, Magic Lessons. It’s short, powerful, and a great example of how to draw in your everyday listeners AND your famous friends, while still being of mega service.  She’s a Wood Frequency, and you can really see here how she wants to help people move forward and achieve big things in the world.  (Not sure what that last sentence means? Hop on over here to get the scoop.) I’ve been talking about the episodes a LOT – and people have been asking me where to start, so I am downloading all in one place so you can pick and choose episodes that speak to exactly where you are in your creative business.  All episodes can be listened to here.  Honestly, start with Episode 12 – her interview with Brené Brown. If you for some … Continue reading

Biz Love Blog Tour: What Kind of Boss Are You?

April 16, 2015 / Inner Game / 7 comments

When I first started my business I was so swept up in what I was going to DO and how much I was going to MAKE and how much free time I was going to HAVE that I forgot to ask myself one simple question, that would impact the entire trajectory of my business: What kind of boss was I going to be to myself?  What I didn’t realize when I started my journey of self-employment, is that while I was the founder, the CEO, the bookkeeper, the admin, marketer, social media manager, and every other role in one person, there was one really fundamentally important role I forgot.  Boss.  I am THE boss, and I am the boss of me.  I am my own boss. Normally, when I hear people talk about the word boss, it applied to a lot … Continue reading

Stop Being a Guest Star on Your Own Show

October 6, 2014 / Inner Game / 2 comments

One of my favorite pop culture terms is ‘starring vehicle’.  It’s often used with derision to describe a movie or tv show that’s being developed specifically to showcase an actor as a star.  Like somehow being intentional with the fact that they want to showcase their specific talents and strengths as an actor undercuts the ‘art’ of it all.  That creating a role, tv show or movie specifically for them is somehow cheating, or not working hard enough. Which is crazy to me. Why would you want to keep taking roles and appearances that don’t let you showcase your chops?  Why should you be judged for forming strategic partnerships that might enable you to grow your career faster?  To me, this maps perfectly to the experience of an online business owner.  We feel like there’s a certain route we need to take, a well … Continue reading

If Your Heart Is Not On Board, None Of This W...

August 20, 2014 / Inner Game / 5 comments

I have had one heck of a summer vacation.  For the first time ever, I’ve taken time off.  I’ve spent almost every Friday since early June unplugged and adventuring.  Locally to the river or mountains, or not-so-locally roadtripping to Portland or Los Angeles.   I’ve gotten more sun this summer and had more moments of pure relaxation than I can count.

I also built a new website.  Tadahh!  Which honestly was just as challenging and exhilarating as learning to surf.  Which I also did this summer.  There’s SO many moving parts. We were building this baby custom from scratch, so it felt like really high stakes, slow motion, collaborative art project.

And it brought up a ton of my shit.  

This website is now the second most expensive thing I own, second only to my car.  I have poured more money into this site than my dog, travel expenses and grocery budget for the year.  

That statistic alone has give me more than a few freak outs.

I took new photographs for this site.  After investing in a very fancy set less than 6 months ago.  First of all, the fact that I have now done TWO professional photoshoots boggles my mind.  Second of all, it felt irresponsible to invest in photography again so soon after the first set.  Like I somehow wasn’t getting my full value out of the first images I paid for.  I so did! But my freaking out brain had a LOT to say about it.

The night before my photoshoot, I found myself crying in the waiting room of my local spa.  This was pre-massage, which was supposed to mellow me out.  I was FREAKING OUT about my photoshoot and website.  I felt like I didn’t deserve to be so ‘indulgent’ and that I should just shut the whole thing down.  Cancel the shoot, scrap the project, go back to being Ellen with a ho-hum website.

Suddenly, it dawned on me that I was upper-limiting.   

Upper-limiting is when you come face to face with whatever you’ve decided is as far as you can go.  It feels like an emotional glass ceiling.

Right there in the middle of the spa, I ran into mine. Crying my eyes out, not wanting to go forward with what I KNOW is a really smart business decision.   What struck me as I realized I was in fact, upper limiting and NOT having a nervous breakdown, is how intertwined, really truly melded our businesses are with our hearts and personal stories.

Duh, right?  But it was stunning to me that as a business strategist, I KNOW an effective website is imperative.  I KNOW that professional, personal photography helps you get ahead.  I deeply understand the need for effective and efficient copywriting on said site.  But when it came time to invest that money in myself (because right now, my business is really just me) I freaked out.

My business brain said yes, but my personal heart said you are crazy, irresponsible.  Which is such a loaded word for me it almost hurts to type.  

So I had to spend some time with my heart + brain, to get them on the same page and walk them through the process.  Breathe through the price tag and trust that these investments would be long term.  The massage helped.

What happened next was I used all my money making mojo to make sure that I had enough money in the bank to not only pay myself, but invest in myself.

It’s a new level of business development, when you have enough money to pay the bills and yourself, as well as make significant investments in your business future.  It feels incredible and abundant and honestly it’s took me a minute to get used to this new level of financial stability.

All summer, in-between adventure Fridays, I kept doing what I do, which is helping my clients reach new money making heights, all the while creating something really vibrant behind the scenes, that will help me showcase my work even more effectively.

I am thrilled with the results.  I feel like I worked with my personal dream team creating something professional, but also personal.  I want to skywrite their names in gold sparkle glitter dust, but that’s not a thing.  The next best thing is to fawn over them as publicly as I can on the internet, because truly, it takes a village.

I would not be where I am today with out these amazing ladies and my incredible friends that surround me, keeping me grounded, focused, and dreaming big.

Lis is a stunning website designer, who not only made this site look amazing, she made the back end incredibly simple for me to manage, which was a huge priority to me.  I wanted a custom site I could drive myself, and I so can.

If you live in the Bay Area, or really anywhere in California or the West Coast and need pictures taken, you need Jenny MacKenzie.  She could not have been more pleasant + infectiously delightful to work with. She showed up with bubbles and sidewalk chalk, and I showed up with my bestie and Best Artist of the East Bay Jolene Russell, who is RENOWNED for her chalk art.  Together we created magic, and if you want custom art, chalk or otherwise for an event in the future, she’s your girl.

I also showed up with my bossypants sister Alice, who creative directed the entire shoot.  She’s a rock and a hurricane, and none of this would be possible without the depth of our relationship to anchor it in.

All of these women helped me integrate my heart and brain, so that you’re seeing both of them reflected on this site.

After I spent the time to make sure my heart understood what I was up to, and not let my brain take over driving, things got easier.  I felt like I was no longer working against myself, fighting battles that I couldn’t see, but I sure as heck could feel.  

I was able to relax and rise into a new level of abundance and growth.

Which is what I want for you.  Is there a place in your business where you need to get your heart more on board? Where your brain has maybe run away with things is trying to force things?  Take that time to align and integrate yourself, and see how much easier things feel after you’re done.

And if you have experiences with upper limiting or want to share your getting your heart on board ahh-haas, I’d love to hear about it in the comments!

How To Keep Going When It Feels Scary As Heck

July 31, 2014 / Inner Game / 5 comments

I have learned one really deep truth over my years coaching, running my own business, and supporting other business owners – and it’s that everyone feels scared, overwhelmed and intimidated by their Purpose, or Bigness. On the outside looking in, most of the time, these purposes, these callings, seem wonderful.  They seen wonderful, like the world is just waiting for this person to step into their Bigness and radiate their life purpose and dreams expressed into reality. To the person on the inside, having their Alice in Wonderland everything is different now, moment, it feels scary.  Hard.  Overwhelming. Because for them, this is their own special challenge.  They must walk through the scary forest so they can come out the other side, forged, learned, and shining brightly. I have a theory that we sign up for a heaping double helping of the life … Continue reading

I “went fulltime” 5 times

July 13, 2014 / Inner Game / 4 comments

This story is part of a movement – the Busting The Overnight Success Myth: Community Blog Tour, where 21 ladies who have made their dream business a reality (in a variety of different niches) share what it really took for us to make this happen.  Including the not so pretty stuff.     When Allison Braun (The Business Joyologist) shared her vision for this blog tour with me, I knew I wanted to be a part of it because I want to share the behind-the-scenes truth of what it takes (and keeps taking) to make a business go.  So here is my story. It’s raw, real and includes things I’ve never shared before! This is a story about handling your money stuff so you can create the space to grow your business from a place of focus and creativity, instead of scarcity and desperation. I quit … Continue reading

3 Things Surfing Will Teach You About Business

July 9, 2014 / Inner Game / 4 comments

{This is a guest post by my incredible client Karen Pery.  She is taking her passion for leadership development through experiential learning to an entirely new level.  Surfing + leadership + business development? Yes please!} The stakes are high. You have a lot on your plate. You have a unique vision of the way things could be in the world, you’ve made it your life’s work, and it’s working.  Well done!  How are you managing the pressure of all of that?  How do you stay focused on what’s most important, when EVERYTHING is important? I’ve struggled with this, and the answer I have discovered to help me focus, balance and be more graceful in my business? Surfing. As a Leadership Coach, I realized I can’t just TALK about leadership, I have to DO leadership.  As an incredible business owner, I bet … Continue reading

What Type Of Relationship Are You + Your Busi...

July 2, 2014 / Inner Game / no comments

The other day my friend Illana Burk (of Makeness Media, she’s amazing.  I’ll link you at the bottom when you’re done reading) talked to me about business being an abusive relationship.  As soon as she said it, I leapt to my businesses defense “It’s not abusive! My business has been the BEST relationship I’ve ever had, because it forces me to deal with my shit, keep showing up and choosing me, love and possibility instead of cowering in fear.” <– that’s a direct quote from my reaction to her. That might sound mellow dramatic, or romantic, but I do believe that my business has been one of my greatest relationships to date. It’s TOTALLY taught me to be a better person.  With the exception of loosing a loved one, nothing else has made me look at all my stuff, and work it out in … Continue reading

3 Steps to Build Your Confidence & Stop Struggling

June 20, 2014 / Inner Game / no comments

{Guest post by my brilliant + talented sister, Alice Walker} Last Sunday I was driving up a sunny, blissfully open freeway, windows down and the surrounding hills green and inviting. The weather was hot, and the cows that dappled the side of the road where all laying down, or jostling for the prime spot under stretched oak trees. A warm breeze picked up, and began to blow hard, whistling through the car window. I glanced up to the sky and saw a hawk (or similarly sized bird) hanging suspended mid-air. Its wings were flapping furiously, it was clearly working as hard as it could to stay in place, and not get knocked off course by the wind. I was struck then, with how much easier the bird would have it if it simply extended its wings and let the warm … Continue reading

Accepting that Business Doesn’t Need to be So Hard

March 27, 2014 / Inner Game / no comments

Here’s the thing – I come from a very strong family work ethic.  It’s a BIG part of our cultural identity.  And, in my family, work ethic is synonymous with hard work.  We, are Hard Workers.  It’s what we do, it’s who we are, and it’s part of what ties us together. When I quit my traditional, insurance paying, consistent paycheck giving job many moons ago, it was HARD for me.  Not to give up those things, but to understand where I fit in my families cultural identity now that I wasn’t Working Hard any more. I mean, I was working hard, but it didn’t FEEL hard.  It felt passionate, it felt creative and fun.  I was shocked (and elated!) I was getting paid for it.  Every now and then I still look around and get confused about how I … Continue reading